They Might As Well Have Skipped the Valentine's Day Gifts

Rules for having an argument with your significant other:
  1. No hitting
  2. No hitting with cars
  3. No fighting while one of you is hanging on top of the car, punching through the window, while the other one is driving down a busy road and running into several other cars
On the other hand, the make-up sex for this fight would be something spectacular, assuming that they can set up a joint conjugal visit at the prison...