In the News

Clyde reads the news so you don't have to:

First, in the "Tell Me Something I Don't Already Know" Department, there's this Reuters article about Stradivarius violins: Wood density holds key to Stradivarius sweet sound

Researchers using a medical scanner have worked out why a Stradivarius violin sounds so good -- it is because of the remarkably even density of the wood.

And why was the density of the wood so even? Two words: Maunder Minimum. That was the period from 1645-1715 when there were almost no sunspots at all, and also the coldest part of the Little Ice Age. Antonio Stradivari, who crafted the violins that bear his name, lived from 1644-1737, and the violins that are acknowledged as his best work were made from 1698-1725, from trees that grew during a period of extremely cold winters and cool summers, a point that was noted in this BBC article four years ago.

The global warming fearmongers would like to return us to this kind of climate, which they consider "normal" compared to today's roasty-toasty climate. It should be noted that cooler climates result in lower crop yields and increasing risk of crop failures and resulting famine, as well as increased disease. A warm climate is not a bad thing.

Second story: Brinkley's husband details affair with teenager

Christie Brinkley's estranged husband said Wednesday he had sex with his teenage lover in his office, then paid her $300,000 while hoping to keep their affair quiet. He also showered her with spending money, including $500 hidden under a rock.

Niiiiiiice. Poking the 18-year-old in his office, paying her $300,000 in hush money, having a $3,000 a month porn site habit, and then having his lawyer try to play like he's the victim? Get outta here! And really, three grand a month for porn? Any reasonably savvy computer user can find plenty of porn out there for free. For that kind of dough, he could have found a nice (or not-so-nice!) girl like Ashley Dupre to get his rocks off.

Finally, there's this, from the UK: 80 per cent of men 'face female sex pests'

Most men are sexually harassed by women at work - but are afraid to complain to their employer, say researchers.

Four out of five male workers had experienced such harassment from a female colleague, according to a study for employment law firm Peninsula.

Two-thirds of the 2,300 men questioned also said that sexual banter was inappropriate at work.

Hey, are those kilts you guys are wearing or skirts? Jesus, "man up" over there! If those "sexually harassing" women are anything close to attractive, just give 'em what they're asking for... Off the work premises, of course!

The last paragraph is true, however, at least for men: If you like your job, it's best to keep it strictly professional, because some woman will take it the wrong way.