"What do these deer think when they see you coming?" I ask him. "Here comes the nice guy who puts out our dinner? Or, there's the man that shot my brother?"
"I don't think they're capable of either of those thoughts, you Limey asshole. They're only interested in three things: the best place to eat, having sex and how quickly they can run away. Much like the French."
Then there's this somewhat related story I spotted in yesterday's USA Today: Amnesty program takes stab at UK's 'knife culture'
"When knives are outlawed, only outlaws will have knives." Then they'll take away those dangerous forks ("You could put somebody's eye out with that!"), then figure out that spoons can be sharpened into shanks and thus must also be banned, and then Bob's your uncle, everyone in Britain will be back to eating Henry the VIIIth style, with their hands. Really, it sounds almost like something that Monty Python would have come up with.
We had a mailing today from a Florida Democrat politician. I won't name him, since I don't want to give him any kind of plug, but his initials are R.S. The odd thing about this large-sized postcard mailing is that while it extols how much he has fought against "right-wing Republicans" and "right-wing extremists" and for "Democratic priorities" (code for "electing our people so that WE can divvy up the political spoils instead of those nasssty Republicansses! We hatess them, Precioussss! We hatess them forever!"), at no point on either side of the postcard does he tell us what office he is running for! Congress? Governor? Dogcatcher? We don't know, he doesn't say! He's just offering "Democratic leadership for Florida." No thanks, R.S. I don't trust a fellow who won't even tell me what he's running for.
Also, he claims credit for "spearheading the closing the notorious Florida boot camps and opposing physical abuse or psychological intimidation of juveniles." Sorry, R.S., but you are way wrong on this one. This isn't little Bobby or Suzy from the middle school who didn't turn in his homework or forgot to return her library book. These are BAD kids, on the road to a life of adult crime, and I don't have ANY problem with a little psychological intimidation of the little darlings (although killing them is going over the line). It's called "scared straight," R.S. Get with the program.