12.09.2009

Tiger By the Tail

So the real question as the women continue to flood out of the woodwork is, "How the hell did Tiger Woods still have the time and energy to play golf at all, much less play it so well?" The last I saw, the number of mistresses had risen to double-digit doxies. His stamina is impressive, even if his judgment isn't.

I read an amusing article on the Us magazine web site, when the number of mistresses was still at nine. This made for some hilarious double entendres in the comments, like: "That's a short course; everyone knows Tiger wouldn't stop after nine holes" and "First he played the front nine, then he played the back nine." And as some commentators on Fox News noted last night, this is a stunningly quick reversal of fortune for any celebrity, to go from respected athlete and pitchman to punchline and laughingstock in a matter of days.

Tiger Woods is not the first man to run into this kind of trouble, nor will he be the last. When you're rich and famous, you have to beat the women back with a stick, if you really want to. Tiger obviously didn't want to, and apparently he didn't have that club in his bag even if he had.

In other Tiger news, Gatorade is dropping their Tiger Woods-linked drink, "Tiger Focus," although they made the decision before Tiger's travails came to light. "Focus"? Was there supposed to be one U in that name or two?

Meanwhile, Tiger can just sing along with Buck Owens.