Lap dancing 'not sexual act' claims head of club organisation
The article is even better when read with Monty Python voices. And that last sentence! How Clintonian! And wouldn't you think that the person in charge of the Lap Dancing Association should be a woman? Come on, ladies, empower yourselves!
In their evidence to committee, Warr and colleagues from the Lap Dancing Association claimed that their clubs should not be classified as sex encounter establishments because they were providing hospitality, not sexual services.
But Warr astonished the committed when he argued that sexual stimulation was not part of the clubs' attraction.
"One of the biggest problems we face is that not enough people understand the business blueprint of our clubs," he said.
"Actually, our premises are not sexually stimulating. It would be contrary to our business plan if they were."
At this point, Philip Davies, the Tory MP for Shipley who was questioning Warr, said he found that hard to believe.
"You are saying that the purpose of a lap dancing club is not to be sexually stimulating? Most people would find that a rather incredible claim," Davies said.
Warr replied: "Then you need to go to a club, because the purpose of a club is to provide entertainment. It's to provide alcohol, it's a place of leisure.
"All right, the entertainment may be in the form of nude or semi-nude performers, but it's not sexually stimulating."
Davies responded with even more astonishment.
"So if I did a straw poll of all the customers who came out a lap dancing club and said 'Did you find that in any way sexually stimulating?' I would find a big resounding fat zero? On that basis you would have a lot of dissatisfied customers."
Warr replied by asking: "How do you measure sexual stimulation. What is the definition of sexual stimulation?"